Maybe This Isn't For Me?

As the holiday weekend comes to a close, and my house is decorated for Christmas, I thought I'd share a little present I didn't have to wrap (because Lord knows I have enough of that to do!)

So tonight I wanted to "talk" about my first meeting with the nurse at the surgeon's office. I had this appointment last Friday (the day before the family headed to Las Vegas for Thanksgiving - may not have been my best planning move, I have to say). This appointment was a chance for me to sit down with the nurse and find out what to expect after the surgery. I won't lie, I was already nervous going into this.

Of course the first thing she did was weigh me. UGH!! Nothing worse than seeing those digital numbers and then hear someone say it out loud. I hate that! I weighed a few pounds more than I thought I was going to, so that was disappointing as well. I will maintain that I didn't take my sunglasses off the top of my head and I was wearing jeans (I won't make that mistake again!).

Once the humiliation of being weighed was over, the nurse left the room for a few minutes to apparently plug my data into some sort of formula so she could find my BMI. Now let me say that I think the BMI is an evil tool. I understand that there is a need to have a blanket way to evaluate weight and health. The problem that I have is that it doesn't take into account a "body-type". A great example is my son. He is ALWAYS in the 85th percentile on his weight when he has his physical.
Being in the 85th percentile makes him overweight! He's not overweight. Anyone who has seen my son knows that he isn't overweight. He's an athlete. He's only 10, but he plays football (tackle and guard), he wrestles, and he's a lacrosse goalie...he's not overweight. But according to the BMI charts he is. Fortunately, we have a great doctor and every year she says to me, "He's not overweight. That's all muscle."

I mentioned before that I have hips and boobs...so the BMI doesn't work for me. It says that I should weigh 142 pounds - that's just nuts! I would look like I was sick if I got down that low (but who knows, maybe this lap band surgery will get me that low? I haven't made that weight since high school). So, for my BMI doesn't mean much more than a suggestion...

*steps off my soapbox*

Anyway...when the nurse came back with that magic number, she handed me a packet and a purple sheet of paper. On this paper was my pre-op calorie intake for two weeks. Yep, that's right...here's where the whole "timing" thing comes into play...I have been on a "diet" for the last week. The paper I had said that for my BMI (which I was informed was 43.5) my caloric intake for the next two weeks was supposed to be 800 - 960 calories! HAHAHAHAHA! Yeah I laughed.  As I looked at the different breakouts, I thought, "Damn! I should have gained waaay more weight so I could at least get into the 1200 calories a day - that I could do!

The reason for the diet for two weeks before is two fold: first, they don't want people to gorge themselves for the weeks leading up to the surgery. Second, when they do the surgery the surgeon has to physically move the liver to get to the stomach, and apparently when you lose weight, the first place you lose it is the liver. Who knew? So the smaller your liver, the easier the surgery, the better the recovery.

I will be totally honest...I haven't eaten 800-960 calories over the past week. I can give all kinds of excuses (we were away from home in a hotel all week), but I have paid attention and been around 1200 calories a day. And really??? If I could eat like that I wouldn't need lap band surgery! But I think that I've lost a few pounds (I'll find out on Tuesday).

Also in this folder that I was given was my post op diet. Ummmm...what? I was not expecting the month worth of restrictive eating. Here's what the month after surgery looks like:

Day 1-3 = clear liquids only (though I can do juices and Jell-O and popsicles - and now I'm

wondering if I can make pizza popsicles??)
Day 4-5 = if not nauseated, I get to have skim milk (I did cringe a little that I might still be nauseated after 4 days)
Day 6-9 = full liquids (I can add pudding and yogurt)
Day 10-14 = pureed diet (anything I can drink through a straw)
Day 15-28 = the "healing diet" (food the consistency of applesauce)
After 4 weeks I can start adding solid food back into my diet.

Oh, and here's a fun one, you cannot drink with your meals. That means, once I start eating, I can no longer have anything to drink. That's HARD!! Next time you are eating, try that. Once you have a plate of food in front of you, push your drink away from you and don't touch it for the entire meal...bet you can't do it!

The nurse was very nice, and she gave me her cell number so I will have it if I have any questions, which I truly appreciated. And that was basically our meeting.

I walked out, my head spinning with all of this information - and I sat in my car for a good 10 minutes crying. For the first time since I had decided to do this, I wasn't sure if I could do it. So much information swirled in my head. The thought of not eating for 28 days, or pureeing spaghetti or mac & cheese (and yes, those were suggested on the handout!) had me really scared.

I'm not afraid of the surgery...I'm afraid of failing.

I called my best friend and vented to her for a while and she calmed me down, because that's what best friends do for you. She reminded me of why I was doing this, of the support that I will have in my life, and how much she'll hate me when I lose a bunch of weight.

So in the end, I have my meeting with the surgeon on Tuesday where I will hand over a small fortune.

Thank you all again for the support, and I'll be back to let you know about the surgeon visit. Maybe there will be something new I find out! And if you have any questions, please feel free to ask me. I do have plans to do a post about exactly what will happen when I have the surgery, and then a week from tomorrow I go for my surgery...that's when the fun begins!